Zombie Butts From Uranus!

That's the title of one of the books by Andy Griffiths, my newest hero. Who, pray tell, is Andy Griffiths, you ask? Well, Mr. Griffiths is the author of a series of children's books -- about booties! Though I have yet to read any of the actual stories, I'm sure they're great! (hint: what do you get an Ostrich for his birthday?) They have to be top-notch quality, after all, Scholastic, one of the leading educational publishing companies in the country, is the company that puts out the book. Special thanks goes to my friend, She Who Grows Backwards, for introducing me to this wonderful series.

"The Day My Butt Went Psycho"
This is the book that started it all. According to the link, Zack loses his ass and travels through various locales like the Brown Forest and the Sea of Butts to find his badunkadunk. And it's 240 pages of butt-roaring fun. For ages 9 and up.

"Zombie Butts From Uranus"
Zack returns as the protagonist of the series -- this time, deceased asses from outer space are attacking Earth, and Z-man raises an army of "butt-fighters," according to the synopsis. Hmmmm. I wonder if he calls upon the powers of the ass-masters in Brokeback Mountain.... No page count given, but this book is for ages 9 - 12.

"Butt Wars! The Final Conflict"
Says the website, "An army of Great White Butts is trying to abutterate our world, and all that is protecting us from buttageddon is Zack." Genius! I wonder if Griffiths characterizes the Great White Butts as analogous to the Nazis! And Zack even goes back in time in his buttmobile to do battle with Tyrannosore-arses. How does Griffiths come up with this stuff?

But wait. There's more. Griffiths is a prolific author whose other novels include:

"Just Annoying" -- 144 fun-filled pages about a really annoying Ostrich...er...boy.

"Just Disgusting" -- 176 pages of crap, hopefully not in the literal sense.

"Just Stupid" -- Which hopefully isn't just stupid.

COLLECT THEM ALL!